Her (2013)

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Zootopia (2016)

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Masters of Horror: Cigarette Burns (2005)

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Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (1992)

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Halloween: Resurrection (2002)

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Green Room (2016)

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Hellraiser VI: Hellseeker (2002)

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Looper (2012)

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Hellraiser VII: Deader (2005)

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Rogue One (2016)

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Latest Reviews

Read up on the movies we’ve been devouring lately.

Solaris (1972)

Editor's Note: I started writing this while kind of blitzed (similar to my Bye Bye Man review, but with maybe half a dozen more bottles of Alpine in me), so bare with me here. I took a sober moment the next day to comb through this write up and clean it up to the...

The Mist (2007)

There seems to be a new resurgence in Stephen King stories being adapted to the big screen. There were not one, but two trailers for King novels-turned-movies showing at the theater last I was there: one of which is drawn from a book over 1,000 pages, the other is a...

Martyrs (2008)

Martyrs has ascended to an almost legendary status in the horror community. It's widely considered one of the most violent, brutal, and depraved movies of all time. If horror fans are known for anything, it's for having full blown dick measuring contests over who can...

Unbreakable (2000)

Unbreakable is a thriller and drama that was written, produced, and directed my M. Night Shyamalan. Now, before you click away, I want you to look at the year this movie was released. This was hot on the heels of The Sixth Sense and naturally, Shyamalan wanted a more...

Hackers (1995)

I'm going to preemptively defend myself here: I love trash films most of the time. I watched The Bye Bye Man, for Christ's sake. It was atrocious, but honestly, I kind of love that I hate it so much. It's a weird feeling. But you're not here to read about my gross,...

Misery (1990)

The worst facet of any artist, is their fans. I don't know who said it originally but I can say, tongue fully removed from cheek that I believe that statement to be true. Maybe more now than I ever thought possible. Misery is one of many Stephen King novels to be...

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Everything Else

Get your fill of our unwarranted opinions, incoherent ramblings, and desire to quantify art.

Horizon: Zero Dawn (2017)

Horizon: Zero Dawn was the inspiration for me to begin writing in this blog. I'll just tell you upfront that I absolutely loved it an I think it will be as a strong contender for Game of the Year. Considering a new DLC for the game was announced this week at E3, I...

Why You Should Start Playing RPGs Right Now

Well, maybe not right now. I don’t know your life. Maybe you’re reading this at 4am in a train station, or in a boardroom sitting through an impossibly long and boring meeting that you thought you’d attend because you were accidentally CC’d on an email about it. By...

We’re Expanding!

Hi folks! Long time no read. As all three of you know, this is a movie blog. When I started Coffee and Illithids, I had no idea what I wanted to write about, but I decided to focus on one of my favorite art forms: movies. I also had an interest in writing about my...

Coffee And Illithids Is On Social Media!

Coffee And Illithids is officially on social media! What better way to stay up to date with the blog than to have my 1000 word essays on weird movies seep into your various news feeds! If you'd like to follow Coffee And Illithids on Facebook, you can click right here....

Friday the 13th: From Worst to Best

I think I've made it clear that I really like the Friday the 13th movies. There are twelve of these movies, with a thirteenth slated to come out next year and while they get a bad rap for being schlocky tits-and-gore horror movies (spoilers: they are 100% unapologetic...

Coffee & Illithids is the place to find interesting and entertaining media reviews and opinion pieces written by a grumpy caffeine addict, his friends, and anyone else he can rope into writing for him.

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